I've been thinking about this idea of child-centered vs. marriage/parent-centered. It seems to me like there is this real fear of becoming child-centered especially within the Christian culture. I've heard about the importance of me time and husband time at the expense of children. Now I'm not saying that those things aren't important and frankly, I don't want to be child-centered. I guess I just think that it's equally dangerous to be marriage-centered. I've seen how that dynamic is so hurtful to children. I believe that it teaches children that they have to guard their self interests at all costs. Well, that's what Mommy and Daddy do, right?
So here's what we are striving for - being family-centered. I explained it to my 5 yo ds yesterday like this. We are all part of a family and that means that we do our best to make sure everyone gets what they want. Sometimes though it's not possible and sometimes (like when your sister is hurt) I have to take care of her and you won't be able to get your ice cream. Sometimes we do what you want, sometimes we have to take care of your sister or brother or daddy or me. But, that's ok, because that's what's great about a family. We take care of each other.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
DD is sleeping and DS3 just passed out on the couch watching tv with his big brother so I have a few minutes to post. We had a rough day. DD got stung by a bee at the park this morning. She is fine, it was just mom that totally freaked out. It was on her finger. She kept holding it up to me as she was crying. I didn't know what to do. It got all swollen. Poor thing. Of course she was laughing and playing not too long after we got back home. It was the first bee sting for any of the kids. I researched bee stings (well I actually called dh to do it while I was holding her) and know what to watch for next time. It's time to get a first aid kit for the van too! Need to put it on my list.